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Showing posts from November, 2008

Kaleidoscope

I heard a pastor once say about forgiveness, that after it’s been given, the burden lays on the forgiver. They must live with the memory of what happened. I’ve never had a flashback before. I think, to some degree, that term is just a part of psychobabble. I watched a movie the other day however, and there was a scene in it that could have been filmed right out my past. To my dismay, the scene freaked me out because it hit too close to home. It's been years since I last wept over those memories. I silently cried for at least half an hour during the movie. I didn't know I was still affected after all these years. I was unable to think of anything else during the rest of the movie. I kept praying for God to get me through this. I also felt guilty because it made me question if I really did forgive in the first place. I know it’s essential I forgive – if I don’t, then why should I receive God’s forgiveness? I told myself, surely if I already forgave, I wouldn't be deal…